2.28.2012

Since You've Been Gone (or, The Time I Got Locked in My Gym)

I know I've been sparse 'round these parts lately but it's been for good reason.

I had signed up to run a 4 mile race and I needed to make sure the 20 minutes per day that I'm not at work were spent at the gym and not diddling with this blog. The race was my first timed race and my goals were to run 11:30 minute miles, not to finish last and to run the whole time. You all know I'm a gym class failure so these are actually real goals. I am happy to report that not only did I run the whole time but I came in at almost a minute faster per mile -- which means I beat out 655 runners who were SLOWER THAN ME. I also now know how to attach a time chip to my sneaker, a skill that will be prominently featured on my resume.


As with any training, there were some brutal aspects. For instance, I was accidentally locked in my gym. They locked the gym, turned out all the lights and left me there. At the very moment I was wrapped in a towel, stepping into the locker room shower with my locker key as my only possession. Unfortunately you need light + a locker key to get in your locker so I was out of luck when the lights went off -- the locker room was pitch black but the gym itself had some emergency lighting. I walked all over the gym, in my towel, yelling "Hello?" but they were gone. How does an entire gym empty out at closing time on the dot and lock its doors when someone is still in the locker room? You tell me. Did I mention this was my first time at this branch and it's 3 floors?

Luckily I didn't have to call the cops to get me out, the only solution I came up with. It turns out the studio next door shared a secret hallway with my gym and a chivalrous stranger came to greet me. While I was walking around yelling unanswered salutations. In my towel (awkward). He showed me the unmarked steel door that led to the shared hallway and offered to get me out of there but it was clear I'd need clothes in order to take him up on this offer. I felt my way through the pitch black locker room, dressed by the light of my previously-in-locker iphone and made my way to the hallway to meet with the Upstanding Citizen to bring me to freedom.

When telling my friend this story she asked me if I was afraid or pissed off when it happened and I said, "No, I was just incredulous the entire time. Like, who the hell gets locked in their gym?" It was also a fun example of how I act under pressure - which is to exist in a state of disbelief riddled by profanity.

I can only imagine this helped me on race day. As I stood out in the cold, in the slow people race corral all the way at the back of the starting line I thought, "At least I'm not locked in the @#!%!@ gym." Thank you for that, irresponsible gym staff.

None of this has anything to do with clothes or ethical fashion, although it partially explains why I was not around talking about either.

15 comments:

  1. I think I would have freaked the eff out. And seriously, how does an entire place shut down and turn off all the lights?

    And congrats on the race! That is super awesome!!!

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  2. Fun locked-in story and great job on the race! I just ran yesterday morning for the first time in like 3 weeks. Really looking back to getting into that mode.

    But what I really want to say say is, whoa those running shoes are RAD. I'd have been all over those if they had been around when I was shopping around last year. Side note: Just googled to find them. Looks like they are Men's New Balance? I did end up buying a pair of Men's running shoes at the time, because they were the only pair of trippy colored ones I could find. All the Women's running shoes were like grey/pink or gery/purple. Gag. Admittedly, I didn't do a lot of pre-purchase research and just bought at the first big box sports store I came upon. But still, what's up with the dudes getting more bright colors to choose from?

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  3. Yeah, I would have panicked big style! I am really trying to get better at dealing with situations like that, but this is too much! I can't believe this happened! I hope they gave you lots of free months at least.

    also, well done on the race!

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  4. THat is awesomesaue! About the race - not the gym lock in.....

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  5. hehe oh dear! I would have been the same, incredulous. Surely they have to check the locker rooms!!

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  6. That is a crazy and amusing story. Amusing because you handled so well (albeit unintentionally well)! Thanks for sharing.

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  7. Oh man, that's too crazy, I would have been freaking out big time. I might use your story as an excuse if people ever ask me why I never go to the gym. :)

    Also, congratulations on finishing the race in style!

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  8. WOOHOO!!! COngrats on the race (I've been a terrible blog reader lately). THat's a great time, esp. if it was in PP park.
    And good lord are those shoes ugly (I've learned to completely discount what my running shoes look like)

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  9. @Dog - it was in Prospect Park and our first mile was the hill. Thank you for being so kind! (And omg between my gray/pink running gloves, track jacket and those shoes...you could see me coming for sure!)

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  10. I can't imagine you doing anything but keeping your cool, Cool Jesse. i would be hysterically laughing, were it me locked in. Thinking "why does this sh*t happen to me?" I always wished to be locked inside the mall overnight when i was younger. And CONGRATULATIONS on your RUN!!!!!

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  11. Wow, your gym story is insane. I'm sure I would have freaked! Congrats on the run :)

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  12. I can't believe that happened! I'm glad you found someone and were able to get out. That's such a great story to tell though. Congrats on your run!

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  13. I've never heard of this happening but you bet now I can say "I know a girl who got locked in the gym."

    I'm glad you stayed cool. Impressive!

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  14. Oh, this is a funny story AFTER the fact, but i would have been mortified if it had happened to me!

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  15. When I was a kid I used to fantasize about getting locked in a grocery store or a toy store overnight where I could consume all the cereal, candy, etc. or play with all the toys I wanted. But this is probably more the reality of what would happen. I'm also amazed though, because the gym I go to has several announcements played whenever it gets close to closing time. Insanity!

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