What I Wore in the Everglades

Due to the severe cold n' curmudgeonliness here in NYC, we looked for the cheapest package deal to somewhere warm. Seeing as we wanted wildlife involved, we settled on the Everglades. (Or, "Florida City", which looks a lot like strip-mall NJ.)

Aside from their recent unchareteristic cold snap yielding many dead fish (thankfully not smelly) coupled with my irrational fear of dead fish, the trip was pleasant. We got to see a boatload of alligators, herons, egrets, ibises, anhingas out in the wild and, at Everglades Outpost Wildlife Rescue, many many exotic species that were either drug bust rescues (big cats to protect the dry goods), owner surrenders (including the poor lemur whose previous owner had all his teeth removed surgically so he "wouldn't bite" and a Siberian tiger) and animals that were traveling shows yet unlicensed.

Anyhoo. This is me at Anhinga Trail, with my new favorite animal - BLACK VULTURES. They hop and woof. Here they are drying their wings, en masse, after a rain shower.

I mostly wore black cotton dresses and sandals.

Here is our incredibly cool candy-yellow car with spoiler. If only it had a headlight bra, too. I am, of course, joking when I say "incredibly cool". I like to think they personally matched us to this car.

Here I am with some pals. Mainly the most smiley alligator ever.

Things I learned during my trip to the Everglades:

1. If you are trying to desensitise yourself of an irrational fear of dead fish, Florida after an extreme cold snap is the perfect place to be. Click here if you want to see a black vulture eating the eye of a dead fish. Don't you feel desensitized already?

2. When you are looking at a map of the Everglades and people start talking about hammocks, it is probably not what you think. If you envision tiny resort-y restful areas swinging in the breeze like so, you will be sadly disappointed. Here is what you are to expect. (Yes, let the Tiny Princesses in us be sad and think of Goldi Hawn in Overboard to make ourselves feel better.)

3. Alligators lie very still and look very fake, even when they are not laying in the water hunting. If you titter around one silent, very still alligator for long enough, it might move to prove its life. Please don't pee yourself when it happens.


  1. I must say, bare legs seem pretty fantastically decadent right about now! I'm all about cheap vacations.

    Also, your rental is amazing. My car also has a spoiler, which is *ridiculous,* because it is a crappy four-cylinder, haha (although it's a hand-me-down that doesn't have a payment, so I'm not complaining). Plus, it has pop-up headlights. If only I painted flames on the side, I would be *awesome.*

  2. Wow, you're outfit here is amazing. I really love the belt!!

  3. Oh, i thought i had commented here already! I really liked this post. Both informative and cute! You look very happy to be out of the cold.

  4. @Alli - it was so nice to not have to wear pants or tights. I know that sounds wrong but I swear I am not made for winter.

    @megara - thank you! I'm not sure which you mean so I will assume it's the outfit in front of the car since I like that one, and its belt, better.

    @Teeny - oh hell yes, I was thrilled to be out of the winter weather!

  5. You are so beautiful...


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